Back to being unemployed

Sigh...today was my last day at the temp job. I haven't been able to discuss the job offer with the people that offered me the job and I haven't gotten anything else. Soooooooo frustrating.

Anybody wanna go diving?

Ansel Adams

Cutie Alert

Confusion

Well, I'm basically sitting here with a dilemma on my mind. I have a job offer but it's for a job that I don't want. I told them that I would let them know tomorrow what I had decided. I'm still waiting to see about the other agency that I interviewed with last week. I was told that the position that I wanted was being restructed or something. I haven't gotten a confirmation about salary yet for a position with that agency. I know that they are interested in me. But it's not for something that I really want to do. Part of me is like take the offered job. But I don't want to take it to only turn around and leave. It's not fair to the agency or the families that I would begin working with. Part of me wouldn't mind a couple days off-especially since it's supposed to hit 100+ next week. Decisions, decisions. Any opinions are welcomed.

Update

Thank God that I didn't have to put Tiger down yesterday. At around 5am, he peed and started eating. Needless to say, I didn't get much sleep Friday night. Thank you Dawn and Tammy for your kind words and your hugs. Right now, he's doing a lot better and chasing his sister and mom around.
Yesterday, my brother came to look at my car. My car has been acting up and has a loud noise and vibration going on. He says that my car won't fall apart on me on the highway so I'm okay. He did change the brake pads and is willing to come over again to fix something else if the mechanic I confer with agrees. It's nice to know that I have his support when I need it.

Devastation

That's how I feel...devastated. I'm probably going to have to put Tiger down today as I cannot afford to pay for what he needs. He again hasn't been able to use the bathroom, eat, etc. I don't know what else to do. I cannot stand to see him struggle for 10-15 in the litter box trying to go to the bathroom.
And to make matters worse, there is something very wrong with my car. I'm hoping that my brother can fix it when he comes to see me today.

Cutie Alert

Cutie Alert

Work Update

I do have a job offer. However it's for a job that I really don't want to do and I could find the same job much closer to home.
I was supposed to have an interview yesterday but I got very lost and no one could really provide me with directions. And, of course, the person that I was supposed to interview with never responded to my phone calls. I did however, receive a phone call from one of her colleagues this morning stating that the person that I was supposed to interview with was sick...so maybe fate played it's hand again.

Ansel Adams

Einstein Quote

"Everything that is really great and inspiring is created by the individual who can labor in freedom."

Reflective

I've been more reflective lately. Why you might ask. Well just over a year ago, my heart was broken. Extremely broken. More than when my marriage fell apart. More than when I lost my first love. More than when my fiancee and I called it quits...over and over again. Just over a year ago, Scott and I broke up. My life was shattered and the only thing I could hold onto was work and my cats. I cried for 10 days straight. Just cried. Tried to figure out where the hell I went wrong. Did I push too hard to leave NYC? Did I try to keep him at home too much? Did I not give him enough Scott time? Scott has always said, and still does as we are still friends, that I didn't really do anything to push him away. He states that the love for me died. How does love die? About a month or so ago, he admitted something that I knew was the case over a year ago. It hurts to know that he finally realizes that something. Something that I had told him and asked for him to try to change so it would stop interfering with us. Something that if it was dealt with then, we might not be where we are now.
A lot has happened in the past year. I left the security of NYC and my union job with excellent benefits to come to NC where my life has been turned 180 degrees. I've almost lost one of my best friends through this process. I've gained a good friendship and relationship with Joey. I've broken a heart that never deserved to be broken. I've lost my job and a sense of security that I've had since I was 22. And I still continue to speak with Scott on a regular basis-odd I know. I still have my wonderful pain-in-the-butt cats.
I believe that everything happens for a reason. I'm happy that Scott is giddy in his new relationship-reminds me how we were 3 years ago. I'm happy that things have settled down for him. I know that he never meant to hurt me. Maybe that's why it has hurt all the more. I'm glad that I have Joey in my life. If I didn't move down here, I never would have met him. I'm happy to be out of NYC...even though I miss my wacky friends, the wonderful benefits, the stability, and the commute I had so I could read.
I'm hoping that this year's challenges will soon stop and I can move forward in a healthy way. And then I can be reflective of how much of a survivor I am dealing with a different type of crisis.

Progress

I finally took a picture of the cross-stitch project that I started about a year ago. Here's what it looked like after last Sunday. I worked on it yesterday afternoon/evening.

Perfect place for Cathy

Last night Joey and I went for some NC BBQ. We went to a little place where there were pigs EVERYWHERE. Little pigs, big pigs. A huge collection of pigs-ceremics and other materials. I immediately thought of Cathy when I saw all the pigs. So Cathy, if you EVER come down here (maybe after a funeral?), I'll have to take you there.

Cutie Alert

Updates

The interview went fine...however salary and benefits was not part of the discussion. The guy I interviewed with didn't have the information. I did get a call from them today wanting me back this afternoon but I was already on the way home so I called them back and asked for sometime next week. I also have another interview scheduled for next Wednesday.
Found out that I'm not getting paid next week like I had expected....not until the 8th sigh....the bills are just piling. Fortunately for me, my fantastic cousin loaned me some money earlier this week and the bank of my brother opened up. Thank God for family.
Now I'm home for a relaxing weekend-have to go to the library and return a book and I'm not sure what else I'll be doing. Joey has to work tomorrow.

Rollercoaster

Tiger decided that this morning would be a great time to go back and not feel well...have trouble going to the bathroom...not eat. I was able to help clear some stuff around his penis to hopefully clear it out so he could urinate...it worked and he has definitely been eating. I did call the vet this morning and picked up some meds on the way home. When I came home this afternoon, he was doing a lot better so hopefully, this morning was just a fluke.

Latest on Life

Well, the couch is in and the cats seem to enjoy it. I've spent my first night on it. Pretty comfortable to sleep on when necessary.
I have an interview Thursday morning. I hope that something works out for me. Would be nice if it was closer to home but...I have the interview.
The temp job is just that...a temp job. Not sure how much longer they really expect us to be needed but oh well...

Weekend update

No papasan chair. Jen and I couldn't get the door open...and because I had to wait all day for Jen, I didn't go with Joey. Which ended up being okay because Jeff couldn't make it (the bass player) so they didn't end up playing AND the puppies weren't there. Hopefully the couch will be a different situation today.