Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Time to



Monday, February 27, 2006

1.5 days and counting

Well, the end is near and I'm not doing what I should be doing. I have lots of notes to write and I just don't feel like doing them. I keep telling myself, there's always tomorrow.
I'm getting anxious. Not knowing exactly where I'll be day in and day out. New people coming in-one eventually here to replace me. Cases being transferred. Me actually going to miss at least one kid. At least I know that she'll be in good hands. I'm not nervous about what I'll actually be doing in my new position even though it really hasn't been concreted. I'm excited about the new possibilities. I'm not excited about my commute but hopefully, things will get squared away soon.

Sunday, February 26, 2006



I just don't want to post. Mainly because soon, Andy, the golden retriever from the Westminster Dog Show is going to be off the page. I could always repost him...hmmm.....

Friday, February 24, 2006

Thanks Scott

I have to admit that I'm extremely lucky to have someone like Scott in my life. Even though he certainly did have to do this, he bought me, for V-day, Fiona Apple's new CD (which I'm currently listening to-so Scott, I'll bring it home for you to listen to), Tori Amos' new DVD collection of her videos-woo hoo, and a introductory book of becoming a freelance writer. So a big thank you to Scott!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

New people in my life

Well, I went to my writing group last night and met some interesting people. There were 4 of us-2 guys, another woman, and me. The strangest thing that occurred was before anyone even met. I had been waiting for the others while, Roy, who had been scoping me since he placed his tea order, came and asked to sit down. I could tell that something was amiss and tried fairly hard in keeping him from sitting down but he wouldn't take no for an answer. Luckily he sat across from me. What was very funny was how he approached me. He called me Sad Eyes and asked if he could join me so he could find out why I was so sad. All I could do was chuckle. My thoughts went immediately to Scott and how happy I am. Soon Kristina joined me in dealing with Roy. Roy claimed that he was a writer and had a meeting with a PR person that was going to help him get his work published. He also claimed that he had been up for the last 48 hours and that he had come from Canada that morning. Eventually he started commenting on the fact that he was a carpenter and that he hated condos, etc. It was all I could do to stop trying to laugh. Luckily, my work in social work helps me deal with characters like this. Then Jonathan came and we all again appeased this poor man who admitted to drinking half a bottle of Jack Daniels. It came down to Roy claiming that he had written songs for Bob Dylan and Eric Clapton. He gave us a singing demonstration along with a poetry reading. Luckily, by the time that Jake arrived, Roy had to leave. For the next hour, the 4 of us got to know a little bit about our backgrounds and figured that we would meet every other week to see how that goes. Definitely an interesting night.

sleeping position?

What Your Sleeping Position Says

You are secretly sensitive, but you often put up a front.
Shy and private, you yearn for security.
You take relationships slowly.
You need lots of reassurances before you can trust.

Simpson Character?

You Are Lisa Simpson

A total child prodigy and super genius, you have the mind for world domination.

But you prefer world peace, Buddhism, and tofu dogs.

You will be remembered for: all your academic accomplishments

Your life philosophy: "I refuse to believe that everybody refuses to believe the truth"

In love?

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

You tend to take more than give in relationships.

You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.

You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.

You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.


Reeses Peanut Butter Cups

Very popular, one of you is not enough.


You Have a Phlegmatic Temperament

Mild mannered and laid back, you take life at a slow pace.
You are very consistent - both in emotions and actions.
You tend to absorb set backs easily. You are cool and collected.

It is difficult to offend you. You can remain composed and unemotional.
You are a great friend and lover. You don't demand much of others.
While you are quiet, you have a subtle wit that your friends know well.

At your worst, you are lazy and unwilling to work at anything.
You often get stuck in a rut, without aspirations or dreams.
You can get too dependent on others, setting yourself up for abandonment.


You Are 52% Abnormal

You are at medium risk for being a psychopath. It is somewhat likely that you have no soul.

You are at high risk for having a borderline personality. It is very likely that you are a chaotic mess.

You are at low risk for having a narcissistic personality. It is unlikely that you are in love with your own reflection.

You are at medium risk for having a social phobia. It is somewhat likely that you feel most comfortable in your mom's basement.

You are at medium risk for obsessive compulsive disorder. It is somewhat likely that you are addicted to hand sanitizer.

Eye Color?

Your Eyes Should Be Brown

Your eyes reflect: Depth and wisdom

What's hidden behind your eyes: A tender heart


Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it.
That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power!
The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism.

You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world.
Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in.
You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you?

You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways.
Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you.
As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.


You Are Mexican Food

Spicy yet dependable.
You pull punches, but people still love you.


You Are a Boston Creme Donut

You have a tough exterior. No one wants to mess with you.
But on the inside, you're a total pushover and completely soft.
You're a traditionalist, and you don't change easily.
You're likely to eat the same doughnut every morning, and pout if it's sold out.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Muppet Test

You Are Fozzie Bear

"Wocka! Wocka!"
You're the life of the party, and you love making people crack up.
If only your routine didn't always bomb!
You may find more groans than laughs, but always keep the jokes coming.

4 days and counting

That's how much time I have left in my current position. I had to go to my job for my computer class and I got there early so I spent some time with my crazy coworkers before I headed to my class. I was informed that my office will be moving Thursday. Now, I don't know exactly where my office/cubicle is going to be or what exactly I'm going to have since I will only be in Manhattan part-time during the week. That leaves me curious. And most importantly, I don't know what to do with my candy store. I have a candy jar in my office that I try to keep filled up for my coworkers. There are strict rules to the candy store and I just don't know what to do with it. I've thought about leaving someone in control of it when I'm not in Manhattan or taking it with me so when I travel to the other boroughs, they have a shot at the candy store too. Decisions. Decisions. One would think that I would be thinking about more important things like packing my small closet/office that's filled with animal pictures and stuff. Nope, it's the candy store!

New part of my life

To go back to one of my goals I've set for myself this year, I'm joining a writing group that is having it's initial meeting tonight. I'm hoping that this group will work well together. Most of the other members have some writing experience so I'm a little wary but looking at it as a learning experience. I figure that with my years of reviewing books, I can at least give good critiques to their writings!

Enough is enough

I've asked for the Brooklyn "fan" to come out of hiding to let me know who you are. I've seen that you frequently check out what is going on with my life. If I personally know you, let me know. The email hasn't changed. If I don't know you, I'm curious on what you find fascinating.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

I'm baaaack

Wow. What a great relaxing weekend with Scott. This weekend was one of my best and a lot of quality time was spent with Scott. Thursday we made it up to CT and had dinner out with his father. We dropped him off at his house and then headed over to his mom's. We chatted a bit and then went to bed.
Friday, we loungily got up and went to visit his sister and her family. Scott's nephew, Ben is now walking and looking as cute as ever. At one point, when Scott had left the room, Ben walked over to me and started wrestling with me on the couch. It was fun. It was also fun watching Ben close his toy house's door and window on Scott. Much better seeing Ben play with Scott instead of him crying at the sight of Scott. Friday night we went back to his mother's and played some games. His mother kept asking for clarification and then winning the games. I don't think that she really needed the clarification-I think that was her way of throwing us off! :-)
Saturday we headed up to Amherst and met up with Scott's friends Jamie and Veronica and their boys for a quick visit before we headed off to a jewelry store and dinner. Unfortunately, when we got to Silverscape Designs in Amherst, it was closing in 5 minutes so we took a quick look around and then headed to dinner. Scott wanted a somewhat romantic dinner atmosphere and the original place that he had wanted was closed and then the next one was busy so we headed to the Amherst Brewing Company for some good food. Then it was back to the hotel. ;-)
Sunday was an all day game affair with Jamie and Veronica. We had some good times and some great food. Unfortunately, Scott really liked one of the games and I killed it soon after the second round started. Little did we realize at the time that I actually won. We thought that Jamie won and he was so happy about that win so hopefully Jamie won't see this. If so, sorry Jamie.
Monday we headed out to Silverscape Designs where Scott bought me a beautiful blue topaz ring which I picked out. It's so pretty. We then headed up to the Bookmill where this time, I bought the larger amount of books. Then we headed back to his father's and then for home. This trip confimed the fact that I need to get out of the City sooner than later. It's amazing to me how I can just feel the stress build up the sooner that we got to the City.
So today, it's another day of relaxing.

Thursday, February 16, 2006


Woohoo!!! I'm on vacation! I'm on vacation!!!! Okay, now normally I don't get that excited about being on vacation but this weekend Scott and I are going up to CT to spend some time with his family and then going up to Amherst, MA. I loved it when we went up last time and am looking forward to spending some quality time with Scott away from the Big Apple. We are going to spend some time with his friends Jamie and Veronica and their twin toddler boys and going back to the Bookmill. So you won't hear from me until either late Monday or Tuesday. I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation.
Now to go stop Boots from making a mess in the bathroom sink.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Westminster Dog Show

Even though I live in the Big Apple and absolutely love dogs, I have yet to attend the Westminster Dog Show. The first picture is the Best in Show winner. And then two of my favorite breeds.


Is it possible to love too much? Too strongly?

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Valentine's Day

To those of you who have sweethearts to spend this day with: enjoy and congrats.
To those of you who don't and are wanting: good luck
Valentine's Day has always meant something important to me. My dad used to get me, my brother, and my mother something small and sweet-usually in the form of chocolate and a stuffed animal for me. Later on, when I started dating, I would get flowers, usually roses (something which I've always appreciated and enjoyed receiving) and something that was usually meaningful between me and the guy. I've also always enjoyed giving something to that important someone in my life. I took some extra thought into this year's gifts for Scott and I hope that he appreciates the thought that went into them, even though one of them he won't be getting today.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

First snow of 2006

It started last night around 5pm. Scott was over his friend's apartment playing a game and I was home trying to get over my feelings of what to do. Scott came home around 11-by then I was already sleeping but I woke up when I heard him come in. I was happy to have him home. Woke up this morning to about a foot of snow outside to only have it continue to fall. I wasn't happy. For one, I hate the snow despite growing up in Wayne County, New York. For two, Scott and I were supposed to go see Syracuse University play St. John's University at Madison Square Gardens. Needless to say, we didn't go. We did watch it on tv and found out that we can go to another home game since we didn't make it to today's. So I think that we're going to try to see Seton Hall. For three, the bookclub that I recently joined was rescheduled to next Sunday and I won't be able to go since Scott and I are headed up to CT and Amherst for a romantic weekend. Something that I can't wait to go.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

No title

Rightly so?
Probably not
Very-all thanks to you know who
Does it get in the way?
Very much so
How to overcome?
Don't know
Be alone?
Move out?
Accepting of unhappiness?
Accepting of loneliness?
Don't want to
But don't see any other way at the moment
Patience needed
But don't always get
Understanding needed
Receive only up to a point
Disrespect needs to stop
On both ends
More love
More laughs
More quality time
More respect
More understanding
More patience
More trust

Friday, February 10, 2006

Weight Loss Success?

I went to WW today and was down 0.2. Not even half a pound. And I made a bigger effort this week then in weeks past. I'm just thankful that it was a loss instead of a gain. So I'm just going to keep trying and see what success I can have next Friday.


I'm sitting here listening to one of my Genesis Cds and realized how good they really used to be. I'm a much bigger Phil Collins fan than a Genesis fan but sometimes when you dig out the old cds, you really rediscover the joys of listening to different music.

Thanks Rob :-)

Just wanted to give my friend of about 10 years, Rob, who Scott and I went out with last night a huge thank you for helping me prove a point. So thanks Rob!!! :-)

18 days and counting

18 more days and I have no idea if I'll have to carry my caseload until someone new starts or if I will be handing over all except for one come March 1. I have no idea what the training schedule will be and when. I'm just hoping that I won't be running ragged. I don't even have a new job title yet-can't wait to see what that will be.

What kind of puppy are you?

Puppy test

Thursday, February 09, 2006


I'm not in jail or even fined. I did have to sit until about 3 in a room full of strangers to be excused from jury duty. So now I'm safe for the next 6 years. Unfortunately, I did come home to realize that I've been recently misunderstood. Hopefully, this will work itself out. But now people have doubts and I don't know what to do to help change those doubts. Should be an interesting evening out.

Jail Time?

I'm off to see if I get the pleasure of going to jail since I lost my jury summons and finally found it yesterday. I was supposed to go a couple of days ago and never went. Hopefully, they'll see that I made the attempt to rectify the situation and let me go or have me serve on a jury and have that be the end of it.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006


Oh to be on my Shitlist.
It's not pleasant.
It's not fun.
ask others how much fun it can be.
Ask the ghosts
Ask the present
Fucking get carried away
I shouldn't have to fucking deal with this crap
I've dealt with this type of shit before and I don't want to deal with it anymore.


Every year for about the last 5 years, I've done the AIDS Walk in New York. I feel that trying to fight AIDS and find a cure is extremely important and would appreciate any and all donations. It's a 10K walk and yes, I do do the walk. Usually, my girlfriend Tracy and I go together. I'm not sure if she will be able to join me this year or not. I don't know if Scott would be willing to join me but I do know that I will be doing it this year pending any conferences or vacation plans.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006


I just did my first yoga workout (DVD) and I found it rather interesting. I remember several years ago going to the local community center with my aunt and frowning on it. Lately, I had been thinking about incorporating different types of workouts in my dvd/video collection. Most of what I have are Leslie Sansone's series and Tae-bos so when my brother gave me a gift card to Borders, I figured that I would order some new exercise dvds and the yoga one was one of them. It was very relaxing (Hatha yoga) and now I regret never really looking into it in the past. Especially, throughout my marriage-probably would have calmed me down just a little bit. So now I'm chilling waiting for Scott to get home so I can cook dinner.


Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my office with a headache that doesn't seem to want to go away anytime soon, I'm in a good mood. Maybe it's because every day I realize more and more how lucky I am. I have a decent job, well at least one that I like for the most part. I'm going to hopefully finish up school soon. And most importantly, I have Scott. I can look across the room and smile to myself and think that I'm lucky to have him in my life. I can reach next to me, just to touch him and feel his warmth. Now no couple is ever happy 100% of the time and we have our moments but overall, this is probably the healthiest relationship that I have ever been in. Scary thought. Considering where I've been in the past sometimes it's hard for me to imagine me being in a healthy relationship. Scott challenges me in ways that I couldn't imagine anyone doing and it's all to better me.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Another Monday

Well, I was happy to hear that Pittsburgh won last night-I fell out during the 3rd quarter. Luckily I got to sleep in a little bit this morning since I had to meet a family at their home and then go to school for a suspension meeting. So I got up around 5am and did an hour long workout. Hopefully, this will all work out on Friday with a weight loss at Weight Watchers.
So I got to the family's home to get there and listen to mother and son screaming and cursing at each other. This went on for the next 3 hours. Arguing, yelling, cursing, screaming. Just pure headache all around. Plus it didn't help that I didn't get a lot of sleep last night thanks to the asshole downstairs and the Royal Family wanting attention. Also with 22 days left at my current position, I almost didn't care anymore. But me being the good little worker that I am, I tried to get them to at least have some space apart. After that, I went to my office to only be there for an hour before my first Power Point computer class. I'm in it because it was strongly encouraged for me to be there. So far it isn't bad. Now Mr. Mush is seeking my attention.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Super Bowl Sunday

Here it is, the end of the NFL season. I have mixed feelings about it. As for the two teams left, Pittsburgh Steelers and Seattle Seahawks, I have no strong feelings for either team. I am hoping that the Steelers win. But if Seattle wins, I won't be upset. I am kinda sad that the season is ending. This is the first year in a long time where I was able to truly watch and enjoy football-no yelling or screaming, and the games came in clear. I'm sure that Scott will find some other way to enjoy our Sundays until August when preseason starts back up.

Friday, February 03, 2006


I haven't had much to say today. Work was fine. My supervision wasn't too brutal today. I did find out that I'll have to be more professionally dressed up in my new position and I'm kinda cringing it. If I was having any success with my weight loss, then I probably wouldn't mind as much but since I'm feeling disappointed in myself and my body self-image is horrible, the idea of having to be in business suits and the such just isn't making me happy.
Speaking of my weight loss (read gain) I haven't had any luck. I was doing well for the first week back at Weight Watchers (lost 5 pounds) but since then I've gained and gained and gained. I've been trying to figure out what the issues are and I've been starting to binge on crap when I get home from work. Why? I don't know. Boredom? Just having crap food in the house? I haven't figured it out yet. So I'm hoping that Scott and I can both cut down on the crap that comes into the apartment and that I can curve my coming home from work bingeing. I don't want to go back to my bulimic ways of the past. I'm also trying to make it to Prospect Park to go walking on the weekends in order to boost my exercise. I used to belong to a gym and can't afford it anymore (so if there are any rich people that would like to donate some money, feel free). I miss going to the gym. It was a definite factor in my weight loss of the past. Maybe soon I can join another gym in the very near future. So hopefully I'll make it to the park this weekend. Even better would be Scott joining me but I have a feeling that he won't be able to. He was home sick today. It seems like all we do is keep trading off on being sick. We were supposed to go see Matt and Lois to play some games but because he was sick, we are not going. Maybe they can come over and play tomorrow. So I guess for someone who didn't have much to say today, I ended up having a lot.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

It's Thursday, February 2

and do you know what that means???? Another season of Survivor begins tonight. So I know what I'll be doing tonight!!! Good thing that I got Scott addicted with watching the end of the last season's.

Olympic spoof

Otto Just press play

the New Pinnochio?

Our leader?

Wednesday, February 01, 2006


I was just sitting here waiting for a few minutes before I started cooking dinner for Scott and I (yes, friends I can be domestic and I haven't poisoned Scott with my cooking) and I realized that I didn't really write anything today. At work, I had no real time because my progress notes were due today and like the bad social worker that I can be at times, I had to do all of them for the month. Luckily I write stuff down during the month. Unfortunately, I had to attend a lecture right smack dab in the middle of my flow of paperwork. So I did my notes and then went to try to find Scott his toothpaste but no one seems to have it and then to get the kids their food and then on the subway. Now I was reminded again why I try to work the hours that I work. People galore. After the train, quick stop to Ctown to get the goods for dinner. I come home and am greeted by the royal family (all members) to now chill out and relax.
Oh and I actually slept through the night last night AND I was able to stay in bed all night (no breathing issues, no heat issues, no annoying neighbors). Woo Hoo!

If only I had watched

State of the Union game